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Monday, January 14, 2008

Weekends in Haiku... fuseball

dallas yoko ono
fuck romo.. donkey and all
cabo wabo style




fall winter quarters
no throw to TO.. no throw
thanks you made him cry

103 Comments:

Blogger Everything Nice said...

I'm not ashamed to admit that I literally laughed so hard I fell on the floor.

I really don't think any one could have said that better.

7:35 PM  
Blogger Scumbag said...

eat shit.

5:14 AM  
Blogger Scumbag said...

also, the first line was 6 syllables, thus making your haiku an utter failure. just like the cowboys.

5:16 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

Haikus are for posers or fags.

Which one are you?

6:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gina - don't put him in a corner like that.. never nice to make a confused person pick a genre.

I don't give a fuck about Romo or TO but I seriously want to ride the gravy train of Jessica Simpson

7:20 AM  
Blogger Scumbag said...

hey gina, first of all who are you?

second, wanna fuck or somethin'?

8:27 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

fuck you.

10:06 AM  
Blogger Scumbag said...

fuck you too?

10:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

fuck you three. all ya'll even...

10:44 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

Looks like it's a slow day for beating up negros at the jail.

12:08 PM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

If that's what suits you in your spare time, I completely advocate that for you Gina.

12:37 PM  
Blogger Brian said...

You're a total sweetie.

1:10 PM  
Blogger Scumbag said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

1:49 PM  
Blogger Scumbag said...

gina, do i know you?

email me. my address is on my profile.

1:56 PM  
Blogger Johnny Menace said...

EN - you mean you did have one for Hassleback crying?... or shaun alexander's gap?

shane - utter failures are teams that make the playoffs.. ok.. .... so that would make the chiefs.... as dead as Derrick Thomas?... did you have to clap to figure that out.. and are you going to point out the other haiku error?


murshy - sloshing around jessica's gravy train.. sounds like a medical issue.. but dumping my gravy train all over her chicken fried steak sounds idea.... even with Joe Simpson watching in the corner

gina - try again.. but with a better name.. you can do better than this.

2:31 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

...

11:00 PM  
Blogger Scumbag said...

the chiefs are beyond failure. there aren't words to describe that tragedy.

4:34 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

I'm just kind of mailing it in. It's just a profile I made to harass a crazy woman and try to get her hospitalized.

https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=31047975&postID=2173859810299643280

Scumbag I don't want to talk to you.

5:47 AM  
Blogger Scumbag said...

bitch.

6:26 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Actually, there are words to describe that tragedy:

1. a dramatic composition, often in verse, dealing with a serious or somber theme, typically that of a great person destined through a flaw of character or conflict with some overpowering force, as fate or society, to downfall or destruction.

2. the branch of the drama that is concerned with this form of composition.

3. the art and theory of writing and producing tragedies.

4. any literary composition, as a novel, dealing with a somber theme carried to a tragic conclusion.
5. the tragic element of drama, of literature generally, or of life.

6. a lamentable, dreadful, or fatal event or affair; calamity; disaster: the tragedy of war.

8:39 AM  
Blogger Scumbag said...

yeah, that sounds about right. i stand corrected.

8:55 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

yes, but do you stand bow-legged?

8:59 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Oh, and Gina love... do be sure to realize that I was quite crazy before you showed up.

They have kicked me out of just about every mental health in the NW.

9:26 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

You're wierd

9:36 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

I admit I am. But only for the next 5 minutes - then I'm strange....

tomorrow I would like to be bizarre though. i think that will be beneficial.

9:45 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

hehheh,

Gina, you must realize, that around here, you are the fruit at the bottom of the bowl.

Hi E!

9:51 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Hello H, my wordsmith of wanton! I see you're still working out your fetish for fruit?

Dear brother.

10:02 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

Well I often like fruit shoved up my ass if that is what you mean.

I just don't like people with names that make them sound like they are the leader of the Ramstein fan club.

10:04 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

I like your words simply because they spent time in your mouth.

I like fruit. I desire all things that choose to attract animals with their tasty flesh to the cyclic truth of the seeds they contain within.

Except strawberries. They're too badass for such games.


Sly sister.

10:07 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

...well, i don't listen to Oomph! or Die Krupps either...

but enjoy that ass thing.

We'll keep you secret, promise.

..er, your secret...

er, naw I liked it the first time.

10:10 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

You work at Kinko's don't you?

10:12 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

the name sounds appropriate


Will you be my special friend?

10:15 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

OOOOOOOOO I like special friends! I would be hurt that I did not receive such an offer.

But you see, I'm already in the family.

Strawberries and Pomegranites - don't forget pomegranites.

10:16 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

I work at Kink Co.s

Yes.

10:17 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

I had to forget the pomegranites.

There was no other way to go on living.

You are the poster girl of Kink Co.s

10:20 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

If by special friend do you mean "will you not tell everyone that my on line persona is a total sham and I suck cock"

Of course darling!

EN you are adorable!

10:24 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

I would very much like to start modeling again - yes.

10:25 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Gina, everybody sucks cock here... why should you be the exception?

I appreciate your adoration. What helmet size do you wear?

10:26 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

Oh I suck cock.

I do!

I do!

10:28 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Well then you're welcome to meander here any time.......

but beware. Bostick eats his young.

10:31 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

Bostick is dumb.

10:31 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

Gina, that is a very complicated meaning for "special friend".

You bring up many interesting and provocative words. "sham" "online" "cock"

Firstly, if one looks at the history of the Internet, one sees a standard progression from the ineffable to the unconsciouable.

You see, there are sides to every conflict. The aggressor, the resistor, the little diode that inexplicably breaks in your cassette player.

There are many levels to consider. And not all of the doorways are clearly marked.

The question really just comes down to:

Do you love me?

10:32 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

I fucking love you like nobody's business.

10:33 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

Each word of that admission is very very true.

10:34 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

Adult admission: $11

10:39 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

The word "online" is interesting and provocative to you?

The word "cock" is interesting and provocative to you?

Take a walk to the store and get a slurpee or something. Smile at the man behind the counter when he makes change!

10:44 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

You should charge more... unless we are sucking cock. and then in that case...

10:46 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Helskel has somebody at home who can make change for him.

No need to laugh at the man behind the counter.

I find the word "online" provocative in the urgent sense.

10:47 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

I like change.

I like counters.

I'm not really partial to slurpees.

I like watching Gina struggle with comebacks.


*inhales the schoolyard air


I've missed this place.

10:54 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

Oh yeah I'm totally struggling.

I wish I could come up with comebacks like "I like change". "I like counters".

Those kill.

11:04 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

Sis,

Vegas still looking possible?


Sullen V is so excited.

11:04 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

Yet, it's still fun to watch.

11:04 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

I mean, it's good to have wishes, goals, etc.

I'm proud of you dear.

11:05 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

I mean did you really need to say that? "I like change". How far will you go to make your point you vicious man. Oh your rapier wit and biting tongue!!!

11:05 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

You're right.

I apologize.

Thank you for helping through this dark time.

11:08 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

I like people that count change to buy a slurpee.

I would like to actually watch Gina struggle - in the physical sense.

11:08 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

I have a brutal surgery in February... but I am certain by march I can make my way to Vegas.

11:09 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

Crap, and yay!

11:11 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

I'll bring White Devils colostomy bag with me. We will have a great time.

11:12 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

You have no idea how much you would like to watch me struggle! And I'll perform the surgery darling! Just bring me 60 dollars, ether, a knife and some Cheetos. The Cheetos aren't for anything really, I just get hungry after I climax.

11:13 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

...well, I didn't want to mention it...

now, I'M the one who's excited.


yummmmmmm, flowable poop tube

11:14 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

Do you really need $60 and ether?

really?

11:14 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

No I don't really "need" anything. I do "like" certain things.

Don't be so stuck in one gear darling.

11:16 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

she called me "darling"!

*swoon

11:18 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Why anybody would still use ether is beyond me - you get the same effect with aqua dots.

I can do everything except the cheetos. I hate cheetos.

11:22 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

what about cheez-its?

would those be acceptable?

11:23 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

And I would need to know if that $60 should be paid in pesos or canadien exchange.....

.....

err, canadian.

11:23 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

No. Nothing with cheese. Unless it's chocolate. Or, a calzone.

11:23 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

hmmm, this has brought deep insight into your psychology

11:25 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

It's kind of for the drama, you will pass out from the pain well before the ether. It's a prop really.

Or course you hate Cheetos! Everyone does! Thats the point! What aren't you getting my love?

Okay I have to go. I must reiterate that White Devil never says anything funny and Johnny Menace is obtuse and vacant, not brilliant and different.

Put a photo up of an Asian whore and a non sensical caption and somehow you are some sort of a philosopher.

It's true darlings!

Don't make me say it's not! It is!

11:27 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

I wouldn't go too deep. You'll bottom out - beloved brother.

11:28 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Johnny Menace has a fan club? Who knew?

11:29 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

wow, that gina is perceptive


like someone you have to explain jokes to...

but maybe they weren't funny in the first place.


And FUCK YOU, I LOVE CHEETOS. DAMN.

11:30 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

and furthermore,

I think asian whores and non sequiturs are the essense of philosophy...

or is that just Confusciousism?


Fuck, that gina's got me all confused again.

11:33 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

Thank you darling...you understand me.

And of course Menace has a fan club! Himself!

HOOT! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

11:33 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

I would call it perception. Only it exudes a bit of envy.

Some of the greatest philosophers of our time were obtuse, vacant, and nonsensical.

and if I remember correctly all or most of them had asian hookers as well.

11:34 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

seriously,

asian hookers are like the ultimate brain food!


that's why Valyna is so smart

11:35 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Gina. I understand you completely.

11:35 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

I don't care for asians... never have. Like Cheetos.

11:36 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

*adds "Va" to Gina's name...


...ahhh, now I get it.


that's awesome,
Just Like A Vagina!!


ya!

*looks around for a high-five

11:38 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

*high fives

11:39 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Maybe Gina is from Virginia...

Virgingina

virginvagina

ginavirginiava

Now im sounding like a cingular commercial all over again.

11:40 AM  
Blogger Brian said...

I understand you too baby.

11:40 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

*shiver

w0w. you called me baby.

*swoon

11:44 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

I know,

her and that silver tongue.


Ok, now say "rape me".

11:46 AM  
Blogger Scumbag said...

what the fuck?

11:50 AM  
Blogger Helskel said...

that works too

11:54 AM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

sliver tongue?

12:16 PM  
Blogger Helskel said...

ok... maybe it's just a false chrome

12:21 PM  
Blogger Scumbag said...

beezo?

12:21 PM  
Blogger Helskel said...

please

12:22 PM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

its too early here to drink - heavily.

12:25 PM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

but i can shoot up if i want.

12:36 PM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

fine. fuck you then.

12:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

twinkle dinkle doo.. a deedlee deedlee deedlee dee

Louis Armstrong

12:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'd also like to say 'hooooowdy' in the genre of heehaw to Gina.

Helsk - long time no see, you appear ripe and fervent.

Scum - try to avoid the centrifuge of bullshit and stay on the cheery disposition of Number 17 Cherry Tree Lane, it's practically perfect in every way.

EN - attention whore, that apparenly needs surgery to remove cold frigid spine. But you've got nice ankles!

Mad Dog: Hey, you the one running this fleabag?
Desk Clerk: Huh?
Mad Dog: Where the hookers?
Desk Clerk: What?
Mad Dog: Hookers, man! Where the hookers?

1:07 PM  
Blogger Scumbag said...

i have no idea what the fuck is going on here.

1:34 PM  
Blogger Helskel said...

...and my work is done here.

1:52 PM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Mesh is rabid. Apparently he wants to insult me.

I never said I was anything but. However, I have not graced this board looking for attention with luscious tits and ass lately - be it mine or somebody elses.

(gave you easy segue way into next insult)

And because you continuously make me feel self-conscious when you call me that... I will remain without said pictures... and entertain you with my sexy brain instead.

Thank you. Mesh. Again. For allowing me to not embarrass myself to these fine gentlemen - and gina.

2:59 PM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Thank you also for the surgery comment. Because it's just not enough to have to go through something like that, ya know?

It's all about the supporters.

3:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

*blink*... k... in light of rereading the term I used of 'surgery' was not in context to your upcoming event. It was in response to the 'cold shoulder' comment I was left.

So let's just mello and try to understand that you're sensitive and I'm male.

7:26 AM  
Blogger JBoombostick said...

Gina

8:25 PM  
Blogger Johnny Menace said...

someone say cheez-its....


vagina - to answer your question .. if you want to join my fan club... you need to email the vp.. and when you join.. lets see i'll have... you.. bill the never published apostle.. these vet guys.. these mental health kids.. and a few others.. oh and carl....

.. yeah then we can finally vote on changing my blog name to Casual Fridays.. it always ends in a tie... Carl votes for it.. but bill.. the vet guys.. the mental health kids.. ect. vote againist... only their vote counts as one.... so hopefully you can make a change in things and break the tie... or i guess the fans of my fan club are going to continue to be obtuse and vaccant

5:34 AM  

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