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Friday, August 15, 2008

Advise please

I think I fucked up bad today, and I know you guys are sick enough to even listen to my story. Also, please bear with me because I’m writing this as I go, it’s still really hard to even think about what just happened.

I have an autistic cousin who I’ve always felt a little strange around. Not because he’s autistic, just a kind of weird sensation in my stomach region whenever he’s around. Kind of like I was to smile real big and throw up at the same time. Anyway, today my parents had a party. This was a big party, kind of a family reunion of sorts, with most of my extended family and a few close family friends being present. Everything was going great, and it came time to serve the cake (no, its wasn’t a lie). My parents had really splurged on this cake, and it was about half the size of our kitchen table. Now my cousin loves cake, it’s probably his favorite food. Unfortunately, all the people were making him really uncomfortable, and he does strange things when he gets like that sometimes. My aunt (his mother) asked me if I could take him up to my room so he could eat his cake in a quiet atmosphere. I agreed, and we climbed the flight of stairs to my room.

We ate mostly in silence, as I’ve never been very good with talking to my cousin. I always find myself a little shy around him when we’re alone. Anyway, he was very interested in all the Gundam action-figures I had collected when I was younger, and had let sit to collect dust on one of my shelves. As these are over my bed, which was the only place to sit, he was semi-awkwardly kneeling on my bed next to me. In this extreme state of concentration he has whenever he’s examining something, he dropped some cake into my lap. Absentmindedly, he reached down to pick it up, almost as if I wasn’t there. As he did this, his hand brushed against my balls, and an odd sensation came over me. Just like the first time I kissed a girl, only it seemed so much more natural. So warm. I looked him straight in the eyes, which he could of course not return because he is autistic. Then, I slowly undid my pants, took the remainder of my cake, and smeared it on my penis.

He took no notice of this, going back to look at the things on my bookshelf. I called to him “Hey Greg, you can have the rest of my cake, ok buddy? You just have to lean down here and lick it up. Do you want it?” His head turned greedily, The saliva almost flying off of his lips. He bent down and began to devour the cake, with both his tongue and his teeth. It hurt some, but then again I’ve always had a secret liking for pain, and this only heightened the soaring amount of pleasure I was receiving. The slop of his lips and the slight roughness of his tongue was only complimented by that dumb expression he always wore. Unfortunately, just at my moment of climax, an orgasm the likes of which I had never felt before, even when masturbating to my favorite bestiality, his mother opened the door.

She came in just in time to see my load get blown all over her retarded sons face, and see his look of surprise at the unexpected shower of icing that coated his neck and chin. She stared at me with such a look of utter shock and bewilderment. I took that opportunity to yank my pants up and shoulder check past her down the stairs. I ran out of the house before anyone knew what was wrong. As I dashed down the street, I heard shouts and yells erupt from my place of residence as people realized what I had done. Fortunately, it was pretty dark, and I was able to duck off of the road and get away to find a proper hiding place. I first thought of the whole "Sanctuary" thing from movies, and ran over to the local church. Then I realized that it was late, and no one was there, so I decided I'd better ask the only people I know that would probably laugh at this instead of lock me up.

Thoughts?

3 Comments:

Blogger Carl Spackler said...

i don't see anything wrong with that. clearly, your cousin is a gay autistic.

i wonder what would happen if you put cake around your asshole. you think he would lick that too?

changing topics...
i went on a date last night with a super hot girl (it was actually our second date) and that whore invited her roommate and her boyfriend. do you think that was wrong for her to invite someone else to join us on our date?

the bitch didn't even invite me in when we got back to her place.

9:58 AM  
Blogger JBoombostick said...

Carl, that is pretty messed up. Did you pay for dinner and stuff? She is probably only into you for your jewgold.

9:34 AM  
Blogger BirdMadGirl said...

I can't even focus cuz the googlie eyes are too distracting.

But yeah.

I like cake.

7:10 PM  

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