Let's learn about Sea Hags!
Let's play a fun game called "let's put a face to a name!!!" We'll start with the term "sea hag".
Here is the term defined:
Sea Hag - Sea hags are fully aquatic, with an appearance so horrific that it saps the strength out of living creatures. The sea hag is also able to use her "evil eye" to kill or daze victims. They have been known to come ashore in order to seek out young drunk boys for their prey, who often have a huge feeling of shame and regret in the morning.
A sea hag looks like this:
Now I will leave it up to you to decide which lucky bachlorette looks more like a sea hag. Really, it's your call....
Bachelorette #1: (defined). Domestic but not pinned down. Successful. Determined. Worked for everything she's ever had. Committed to her lovers. Loyal and over abundantly cared for in her own circle of friends who she is sure to keep contact with at will. Not too many, not too little. Innocent eyes and creatively kind to the point that nobody regrets spending time with her.
Short, round face. button nose. tiny forehead. quirky smile. She looks more like a midget.
Or Bachelorette #2. (defined) Silver spoon fed evil eye cock-blocker that had 4800 friends on her myspace so I doubt she sends Christmas cards. After reading her blog (and I got bored at least 15 times with that) I was able to establish that she's more concerned about losing weight then she is about the 10,000 fans. Unless of course she's bashing you for being like her... intentionally or not. Is she committed? no. Not to a person but I think I have a 'ward' that would love to put her back on Zoloft.
Long face. long pointy nose, large spacious forehead you could land your cock on. And if she mentions her friends its a fucking stretch. Can somebody tell me why this bitch doesn't smile? My vote is for #2 but we're all different of course.
So, alright, Sea Hag. .... It's your call.
Here is the term defined:
Sea Hag - Sea hags are fully aquatic, with an appearance so horrific that it saps the strength out of living creatures. The sea hag is also able to use her "evil eye" to kill or daze victims. They have been known to come ashore in order to seek out young drunk boys for their prey, who often have a huge feeling of shame and regret in the morning.
A sea hag looks like this:
Now I will leave it up to you to decide which lucky bachlorette looks more like a sea hag. Really, it's your call....
Bachelorette #1: (defined). Domestic but not pinned down. Successful. Determined. Worked for everything she's ever had. Committed to her lovers. Loyal and over abundantly cared for in her own circle of friends who she is sure to keep contact with at will. Not too many, not too little. Innocent eyes and creatively kind to the point that nobody regrets spending time with her.
Short, round face. button nose. tiny forehead. quirky smile. She looks more like a midget.
Or Bachelorette #2. (defined) Silver spoon fed evil eye cock-blocker that had 4800 friends on her myspace so I doubt she sends Christmas cards. After reading her blog (and I got bored at least 15 times with that) I was able to establish that she's more concerned about losing weight then she is about the 10,000 fans. Unless of course she's bashing you for being like her... intentionally or not. Is she committed? no. Not to a person but I think I have a 'ward' that would love to put her back on Zoloft.
Long face. long pointy nose, large spacious forehead you could land your cock on. And if she mentions her friends its a fucking stretch. Can somebody tell me why this bitch doesn't smile? My vote is for #2 but we're all different of course.
So, alright, Sea Hag. .... It's your call.
posted by Editor Shawn at 7:41 PM
64 Comments:
I'm ready to play as soon as you stop changing the text and pics.
When you settle on a final version, please let me know!
Good. I wondered if you were stalking and now I know that the moment I hit publish your love lorn ass is here to see me!
I think I'm good. But I had to go back and make sure. I really wanted to find a sea hagish face on Emma but I couldn't fucking find one.
The one you took down was pretty close. The coke-whore stare and heavy 1980's eyeliner and dark circles really brought out that innocence you mentioned.
I know. She's a total coke whore. Just yesterday she snorted an 8-ball off of Johnny Menace's cock. It was amazing. She ran in three circles, and nose dived into the guac.
And you're right. She smeared her eyeliner! Good call, you are on fire today sweet heart.
Can we talk about why you're not at a dazzling fireworks display tonight with your boyfriend?
No?
Ok. Girlfriend?
Funny that you mention cornholes. Did you say cornhole? wait..
Emma is the coolest girl I know so I have to jump in here and take up for her ho ass.
Monstergrill - You have no fucking idea the situation you are causing.. Carrie fights and all that gayness is for kids, you do not want to light this fire.
Back out now.
Trust me.
And when you back out, can you back out into me?
(I promise not to give you a dirty sanchez on our first date).
That sounded like a warning didnt it!
or what? are you threatening her?
No, that was an offer.
Prom is over but if she hangs in there next year I can take her to her Senior homecoming!
No threats.
It just concerns me..
You play with fire and you get gasoline.
Kelly probably drinks gasoline....
Don't you Kelly?
Gasoline.. shit man... More like nuclear atomic shit.
Has it gone this far Shawn?
Not yet... Lets see how the week progresses.
Yes, hold me.
well i just found me a brand new box of matches so let's go.
and yes, gasoline is delicious!
So is afterbirth!
Kelly - Do you have a penis or a vagina?
i like to call it a vajayjay, thanx.
So, both? Fantastic! I can be bi-sexual and still share you with my straight friends!
Do you like trains?
and it likes to smoke menthols.
trains are cool, trainwrecks are better.
Carrie fights? I started that?! Not quite, Bostick. Funny, coming from someone who brags about starting flame wars.
You guys left a comment at Kelly's to guarantee this attention, so now that you have it don't cry foul.
And yeah, that sounded like a threat.
"Playing with fire?" Less drama, please. It's a fucking blog.
Speaking of Train wrecks.
your mom called?
I see. I prefer a down-home Waco-style mass suicide! That way it leaves something for the necrophiliacs to pick through.
Monstergirl - Seriously dude. BACK out! you have no idea what could happen from this.
like what?
May I tell you this. When the shit hits the fan.. I will be ducking.
give us an idea.
Like I pop out your eyes and skull fuck you with Bosticks dick!
ducking or bending down to pick up the soap?
Like I light myself on fire and do a special dance that requires Mexican Donkeys to lick my flame encrusted flesh as I bounce to and fro until I jump thru a hoop in my tutu!!!
i'd like to see you try! you'll be picking up you teeth with broken fingers.
but, the donkey/tutu thing sounds hawt!
Like you fall head over heels in love with my mother and I send the two of you to the bahamas to lick dark meat?
Hey kelly, do you always follow orders or only when barked from the right?
Come on honey, you know THAT sounds fun!
fuck you bostick! hey BRB the fireworks are on!
Holy shit! Who's barking? That's the bitch I want to talk to.
stupid nigger
I see, we were all about the commercials. Sucks to watch the fireworks at home, huh?
Remember I am a klansman
Well that's not very patriotic now, is it Bostick?
But I guess that's kind of a religious thing, what with the cross burning and all.
Hey! You can't separate church and state so I guess it's either one or the other huh?
Fuck that. This is our land not those dirty Mexican fucks.
And Jews.
And niggers and slope fucks.
Slopes are slant eyed people.
I did a slope fuck once! I kept my footing. I was very proud of myself!
OH! You mean Thai hookers?!?!?
Fucking Jews. Trying to get all the money and shit. Only watching out for their jew ass principles.
Queers.
I love Jews. They are thrifty!
Dude my grandfather died in a concentration camp..
Fucker fell out the guard tower..
Oh that sucks! It's probably because my grandfather was schtupping him up the ass!!!
Was he a German nazi? Those guys were dicks.
The russians kicked their ass torwards the end of the war.
That led to a divide in europe between "democracy" and Stalin's Marxist empire. If only the union could win.
Thoughts?
And by the way, suck my cum into your mouth.
Yeah thats right..
taste it baby....
Let it roll around on your tongue untill it turns firm and gets medium rare.
Swallow my albino cum bubble.
Let it get in your teeth and take it back to work with you.
It is good for your hair.
Smelling like cum will get you a promotion.
Lick it off my belly, right there mmmm.
hey bostick! look what your "friend" carrie said about you:
for one thing? i do not like bostick i think he is a lying backstabber and insane. i don't trust him as far as i can throw him. i don't trust his friends, either. they are all wackos.
carrie | Homepage | 07.04.07 - 9:12 pm | #
bostick you are truly terrifying, if i am being used in any shape or form for this threat you speak of and for what i think you have in mind, wow.
it is YOU who is going too far.
anyway my seahag comment seems to have been a good one, it successfully put you over the edge into mental breakdown, clap clap.
clap clap! hooray!
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